Two Liverpool fans are walking in the city centre when they spot an advert in a chemist’s window saying, ‘Free Liverpool season tickets. Apply within’. So one of them heads into the shop, while the other waits outside. Half an hour later,the guy comes out and hands his mate a packet of banana-flavoured condoms. “Where are the season tickets?” he asks. ” Sorry,” his mate tells him, ” I was too embarrassed to ask”.