Liverpool sign a new striker from Nigeria. On the first day of training Kenny Dalglish picks up a ball & says “Ball”. Then he does a kicking motion & says “Kick”. Then he points to the goal & says “Goal – Understand? KICK, BALL, GOAL . . . GOOOAAL!” and the Nigerian says ‘Excuse me Mr Dalglish , but I speak perfectly good English’ Dalglish says “Sit down son, I’m talking to Andy Carroll

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